Connection and Separation

In Jewish religious law, as laid out in Leviticus, there are times when a woman must separate herself from the community. There are also times when a man must do the same. Traditional commentary has referred to the state the necessitates removal as tamei, which was translated into English as impure. The call for separation was understood to be a demand, made by the community of the individual. Tahor, by contrast, was translated as pure, and was the necessary state to join in daily life with the rest of the community

There are several ways to become impure and they range from gossiping, contact with a dead body, menstruation and even giving birth. During the time of the first and second temple in Jerusalem, the journey from tamei to tahor was accomplished by a combination of ritual and actual cleansing.



Most commentary on tamei and tahor has either been a legal style analysis of when one state or the other has been achieved or a humble query into what these causes of "impurity" could possibly have in common. Can you see the common thread that would have a community temporarily exile someone who is menstruating or came in contact with a dead body or recently gave birth?

Neither could I. So, what does this have to do with the gender-unspecified proto-human?

Some Jewish commentators have suggested a new way to understand tahor and tamei that transforms the dichotomy from pure/impure to ways that we connect with other people and god.

I learned this from Rabbi Michael Lerner of Beyt Tikkun. In his telling, tamei is not a separation enforced from without, it is the state of connecting to the transcendent and holy on your own. And Tahor is not purity, but connecting as part of a community.

The law in other, more secular, words lays out moments, birth and death usually, when our connection is primarily to the mystery within. How we can transition back to connections in our community is no simple task, and because the section lays out clearly how to go from solitude to community, I divine an assumption on the part of the author of this chapter that it takes effort to connect with others. That we need time and space away from community to be whole.

Rabbi Lerner takes it a different direction, one that doesn't gloss over the inclusion of gossip as a source of tamei as I do. Lerner's belief is that gossip, birth and death all disrupt communities, and the rituals laid out in Leviticus are about mending the rift.

Those first few months after the birth, I've heard them called the Fourth Trimester, have always been described to me as a trying and cloistered time. When I visited my friends and their shiny new son Noah, it was 48 hours lived in an unending twilight of drawn curtains and quiet conversations.

This child of ours will need guidance and nurturing to become fully who they are. What rituals do we have in place these days for the parents to make their own re-appearance in their community? To make their journey from drawn curtains to bright light?


- This is the aforementioned Noah